Social Skydiving Day 9: Talk Because You're Interested
Today's Interaction
My one social interaction for the day was on my way home. Not really much to mention. I mean it lasted for a long time, but I've found a pretty simple way to meet people and say "Hi" based on yesterday's thoughts and everyone's comments. It basically amounts to me actively looking for someone I think may be interesting and when I find them just start talking to them about what I find interesting. It still takes a some work to ask people but it seems like the best interactions are mutually beneficial as Trevor Rotzien and Recycled Electron said/alluded to.A Buddhist centric idea that I think applies here is to strive to look at the world as a child would. Constraints on behavior, fears, even angers are so much more of responses to exterior hardening situations. I've been trying to enable myself (through all of the ideas I've previously discussed) to walk down the street, not with confidence, but without fear. Men, women, whatever, I look directly in the eye and I've been experimenting with looking as long as I feel the need to. Now I do realize that publicly looking a woman up and down can be considered poor form. That's why we call it an experiment and not a recommended life practice. ;)
Keeping that in mind, today on my way home on the bus a guy was scratching a lotto ticket that looked like a crossword. My interest was piqued so I asked him about what he was doing. I hesitated a smidgen but I belayed my fears by remembering the idea of complimenting him by showing interest and also by emulating the thought of a child. Forget about feeling stupid. This is interesting so I will ask. Soon he told me about that lotto scratcher and so much more!
I guess he finds lotto tickets in the trash and cashes in the winners that people mistakenly discard. He showed me how you can quickly tell if the ticket is a winner (though I've already forgotten) and he gave me a great idea for meeting more people in the future. He at first asked me if I was even somewhat of a "part-time thespian". I told him no and laughed. At some point in the discussion he talked about going to his local community theater and trying out for the lead role and getting it. Pretty cool and it makes sense because this guy carried the conversation with very little prompting from me. If there's any one who can carry a monologue it is him!
He carried on regarding his past experiences as a psychic until he got so weirded out that he self-induced a "shut down". Basically, he blocked his access to his abilities. I guess he didn't feel as though he completely understood it (which I could relate to) because he said that that was how a self-proclaimed witch explained it to him. I'm not going to judge, especially on a blog like this that is aimed at personal growth. I will, however, judge in private so if you know me be on the look out for a private message about this soon! ;D
My Takeaways
At any rate, I had never really considered community theater but I think it's an excellent way to expand myself a little more and do something even more humbling/humiliating than this! It's amazing how much can be gained by talking to random people.
This idea of a kind of objectivist "selfishness" or self actualized confidence of pursuing what you want seems like it might really hold some water. For me it comes down to talking because I'm interested, as opposed to self-interested. Once you feel like you are giving (your time, interest, etc) as well as receiving (someone else's time, their experiences, etc) then you have an exchange and that's a conversation is really. Swapping my experiences and interest for your own. Now if only it was considered polite to directly address that you're not interested in communicating with certain people... ;D
