Social Skydiving Day Two: Still Haven't Embarassed Myself
Not So Great a Start to the Day
I'm actually trying to embarrass myself I swear, though I could totally be trying harder so I promise I will. Today was another day where I set out to meet my social skydiving goal thinking once again it would be a socially awkward henceforth derided day that would give me the excuse I need to remain an introvert and forget about talking to people altogether. I would very much love the excuse to eliminate that stress from my life. Funny thing happened though...
Today was even better. How so? Attractive woman and longer talk. Here's the overview:
So I'm on the bus today. My bus driver I swear to god was either getting lost, not sure what his next stop was, or wasn't sure when to leave or something. Anyway, this meant that every time we stopped to pick up people it was an extended stop. Seriously, at one point he got up and picked up one of the brochures for riders for the route so he could figure out WTH is going on! As sure as I was that I was going to be late to work, I somehow wasn't. But I digress.So one stop we made we sat there for like 2-3 minutes which is hellishly long for an "Express" bus with no one getting on it. Some women who are late catch the bus. As they're passing my seat one of them yells back to the bus driver that she's gonna come swipe her card. I look back at her and tell her the card reader isn't working anyway. She looks at me and smiles like she heard me (she didn't) sits down, and I got nothing left for a good conversation. Meh on that one. Thinking my one convo opportunity on the bus is passed I open my book (which kicks ass btw) and start my reading.
So the bus driver is STILL WAITING. He's just sitting there. STARING. AT. THE. SCHEDULE. BROCHURE. :D
To be fair, maybe he was in training. That doesn't comfort me in the least seeing as how my getting to work at a semi-decent time is not a function of my understanding of his situation. It just means I don't get angry at him and laugh it off instead. As it turns out that was an important point of distinction today.
Lightning Strikes Twice
So I'm reading my book when I notice another cute girl who ran for the bus and was just getting on (she was probably thought he was leaving sometime that hour). She's all out of breath and flustered and decides to sit next to me of all people. I'm wearing a smile and looking out the window because there are more people running for the bus. The bus driver starts yelling at them to hurry up saying he can't wait all day. Riiight. I laugh and make some comment about the bus driver being lost, shyly directing it to the woman sitting next to me hoping that it will be enough to get her engaged in a conversation. She chuckles and says "Sometimes it's hard to wake up in the morning." while lightly laughing as a response to the bus driver's continued prodding of the late passengers.
So I ask, "Is that what happened to you this morning?" She's got a couple of lipsticks out and she's rifling through her purse. "Yeah" she says as she nods wearily. I close my book and say something like "Aww that sucks." and I think it's just gonna end there. I'm ready for that. I get nervous around cute women and freeze up so I just chill. The book stays closed though and that's really important I think. If you are actively engrossed in a book or have your headphones on, you are the reason no one is talking to you. I'm sure of that. It signals everyone around you to not bother you. There are very few people who will push through a barricade like that (reading isn't as bad as headphones though).
Finally the bus takes off. I'm sitting there with my book closed praying to god it doesn't all end here since my commitment to myself yesterday was to go for a longer talk today. Then she says something like "That's why it's great to not have a certain time to be at work." and I'm thiking "Awww yeah, here we go." I ask her what she does for a living and then we just talk the rest of the bus ride.
How much so? Well, I found out she lived in Florida, and in MA before coming to Seattle and that her Dad fly fishes. I learned she's a bank examiner, I learned what a bank examiner is. I also learned she enjoys keeping some plants at home and has no pets. Boyfriend? Not sure.. Flirtatious social skydiving isn't happening this month. Baby steps. ;)
She asked about me, what I do, where I used to live, etc. It was a pretty solid talk. Ended well enough that if I do happen to see her around again it will be a no brainer to be able to just start talking to her.
When Does this get Hard?
Seriously. Where is the mass of rejections I've been so sure I was gonna see? I mean granted, I'm only two days in but I'm feeling pretty damn positive about the whole thing for being an introvert forcing himself to talk at length with strangers. That's not to say that it's easy. I could really use some work on really relating to other people and responding with more genuine probing questions but I mean, that'll get better with practice and overall it's positive so I'm not too worried about it.
After just two days I'm starting to view those crowds of people on the street in a completely different way. They're beginning to look more like person farms with a rich and diverse set of experiences and stories that are ripe to be harvested. Wouldn't you feel comfortable going up to an orange tree and giving some of the oranges a lil squeeze to see if it's ripe? Why not people? BTW, do NOT squeeze people you don't know! That is a metaphor. You squeeze many types of fruits to test if they're ripe, with people you make eye contact and say "Hi". People fruits that respond well to a strange person squeezing them are not the kind of fruits you want to be picking. Just trust me on that.
Anyway, this whole thing is getting addicting. I have rock climbing tonight so I'll be socializing a bit and will have a chance to talk to some more people maybe I can still succeed at doing something foolish. Then again, I'm starting to think that maybe, instead, I'll succeed at doing something that truly amazes me.
